She asked me to write about what I learned.

I learned I knew nothing of substance
About my roots, my culture, my kupuna.
A very sad commentary after six decades of existence
It is as though my life is a vignette,
A collage of ethnic snapshots,
Japanese, Chinese, Hawaiian, American
Scattered helter skelter across my consciousness.
Who am I? Really?
What do I stand for? Really?
What are my motivations? Really?

I know I am a poi dog, polyracial.
I know there are aspects to respect...
The Japanese Daruma doll...seven times down
Eight times up...a demonstration of perseverance
The Gambare Spirit to keep getting back on your feet.
"I tell you one thing, you will know 10 things,"
A seemingly quixotic proverb with vast implications.
"Heaven lasts long, and Earth abides
What is the secret of their durability?
It it not because they do not live for THEMSELVES
That they last so long?" Wise words from
Thought shattering Lao Tzu
Where oxymorons make sense and become reality.
Eat bitter things to cure your stomache troubles,
Kau yuk will give you a beautiful complexion
Friendly advice from Aunty Rose Tom,
Dad's favorite sister, the one with the porcelain skin.
Aloha...a greeting, a farewell, an action,
an emotion, a noun, a verb, an attitude.
Come inside, come inside, eat, eat
Hele mai e 'ai...generous ho'okipa, hospitality
Without ulterior motives or desires for repayment.
No show off, be ha'aha'a...ho'omanawanui
Patience is a virtue
The land does not belong to you...
You belong to the land, ke one hanau
E Hawai'i e ku'u home hanau e
Know your place in the 'ohana, ke kaiaulu
Keep the loving attitude
Abide by the proper protocol
Fulfill your kuleana, respect
The soft and strict edges of Hawaiian existence.
Who am I? Really?
What do I stand for? Really?
What are my motivations? Really?

I am a person lost in a chasm
My place in history is a nebulous black hole.
I am Hawaiian but not Hawaiian
The ancestral memories and 'olelo Hawai'i
Have been whitewashed by pidgin and English words and thoughts.
I am not old and yet
When I talk about plantation camp life
My students look askance
As though these lifestyles were third-world countries.
The journey is before me
Like Hi'iakaikapolioPele.
Finding people who will help nurture growth
on this journey,
Facing head-on the mo'o, the detractors,
the naysayers who block the path.
Looking into the unexplored depths
Searching for the light in dark places.
A journey of maturation can take place at any age.
And this is only part of what I learned.